Violent Night

The film’s biggest weakness is that it doesn’t know what it wants to be; is it a farce, is it a serious action flick with a ridiculous premise, or is it a screwball comedy? Instead of picking one of those, it is all three at different times. Violent Night works best when it takes itself seriously. The ridiculousness of Santa, in full garb, absolutely wrecking bad guys is enough to provide the desired laughs, sprinkle in a little girl in danger, and you’ve got yourself a movie. However, including cartoon characters behaving in ways that no human would, rips you out of the moment and ruins any emotional investment that you might have had, and this flick has its fair share of this.

I dinged the performances pretty hard in our star review and that’s because of two things: 1). most of the actors and actresses were fine but nothing to write home about. 2). Morgan Steel, played by Cam Gigandet (Twilight). Morgan Steel is easily the most egregiously distracting character. Remember Ellis from Die Hard? Mogan Steel is Ellis without the charisma and intelligence.

Steel is an insipid aspiring actor who is also the gold-digging boyfriend of Alva Litestone, played by Edi Patterson (multiple single-episode appearances on TV programs). He’s also the movie equivalent of erectile dysfunction. Here’s a great example: in the midst of a hostage situation, in which he is one of the hostages, he gives the Litestone matriarch, Gertrude, played by a wasted (talent-wise, she wasn’t drunk or anything) Beverly D’Angelo (National Lampoon’s Vacation series) a full-color film pitch packet and tries to convince her that it’s a gift of a golden opportunity. Again, he’s 10 feet away from a machine gun-wielding maniac who he saw commit murder a few moments ago but somehow thinks that now is the time to pitch a movie. The over-the-top ridiculousness of Morgan Steel could work in the right context (see cousin Eddie in National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation), the problem is that the movie shifts tones from Die Hard to Dumb and Dumber at neck-breaking speed, giving the audience no time to relax into a comfortable the flow. Also, unlike National Lampoon, Morgan isn’t the only ridiculously over-the-top character.

So, what’s good about Violent Night? When it is on point with the primary storyline, Santa is stuck in a house full of murderers who he must brutally kill in order to save a young girl, Violent Night is magically delicious. It’s dark and funny, brutal and exciting, and David Harbour is perfect as Santa in every scene. Seriously, if it weren’t for the goofball characters mucking things up, I’d given the movie 4 or 5 stars for performance just for him. Fortunately, the movie is only very occasionally interrupted by the goofballs.

There’s also an hommage to Home Alone that, at first blush looks like it won’t work but it lands like paint cans on Marv’s head, wickedly funny.

WOKE ELEMENTS

Rich white people being evil, narcissistic, douchebags has been a film trope forever but what truly makes it woke is when the screenwriters try to teach the audience some dumb progressive lesson with it, like being successful is evil. They’ll usually have a person of color be the only voice of reason, and all of the whities will either learn their lesson or come to a terrible end. While Violent Night does have a person of color as the only voice of reason, the movie does a great job of subverting conservative expectations with one little line near the very end when the rich matriarch expresses her pride in one of her children for their greed and ambition. Plus, by the end of the film, the erstwhile reasonable person of color seems to be more on board with the family than ever before. I truly think that the filmmakers were having a bit of fun with those of us expecting wokeness in the film.

The post Violent Night first appeared on Worth it or Woke.

Of course, hijinks ensue because neither Mantis, nor Drax, know much of anything about Christmas, or how to reasonably interact with other sentient beings. This is where the show could have easily become a genuinely heartwarming story about the meaning of Christmas but, instead, it turns into a fish-out-of-water cliche that relies on cheap and obvious jokes and slapstick to get easy laughs. Don’t get me wrong, it still works, mostly due to the reliably charming and charismatic performances of Mantis and Drax. Their on-screen chemistry can’t be denied, and it carries the special. However, it had the talent involved and the budget to be much more.

The show has no grand internal revelations, and Linus definitely never shows up to tell everyone the real meaning of Christmas. It’s a surface-level show that lovers of the Guardians franchise will enjoy, and small children should avoid.

WOKE ELEMENTS

The program is titled The Guardians of The Galaxy Holiday Special, but it is completely and singularly about Christmas, not the holiday season, not Kwanza, just plain old vanilla Christmas. The program is literally a metaphorical Christmas orgy. In the beginning, the Marvel logo is strung with Christmas lights while the animated prologue and epilogue center around Christmas time, a Christmas tree, and Christmas presents. A song about Santa clause takes up several minutes of the first act, and a Christmas decorations store is raided in order to decorate the Guardian’s home, Nowhere, so that they can make it look like a traditional North American Christmas for Peter. There is no subtlety or ambiguity that the show is about any other holiday, and the word “Christmas” must be said a hundred times throughout. So, just call it a Christmas special.

There’s a moment when Drax and Mantis see a manger scene and look at it, and one another, with confusion and skepticism.

Finally, I would argue that it is decidedly woke to actively court a young demographic and then insert completely unnecessary adult elements into your program (stripper-esque drag shows for children anyone?). There are two moments that make this show inappropriate for young children, and both could have easily been substituted or left out completely. The first is that, while on Earth, Mantis and Drax find themselves in a bar where they do shots, get fall down drunk, and Disney’s obligatory gay character hits on Drax. The second is a line containing the word “shit” delivered by Nebula for comedic effect. It’s perfectly delivered, totally lands, and is funny but it could have easily been omitted without diminishing the show an iota.

The post The Guardians of The Galaxy Holiday Special first appeared on Worth it or Woke.